Category Archives: Ancient Jokes
Σχολαστικὸς νοσῶν, εἶτα πεινῶν, ὡς οὐδέπω τετάρτη ὥρα ἀπηγγέλη, ἀπιστῶν πρὸς ἑαυτὸν τὸ ὡρολόγιον ἐκέλευσε κομισθῆναι. A pedant, being sick and then hungry, and suspicious as the fourth hour was never announced, ordered the sundial to be moved into his … Continue reading
Σχολαστικὸς εἰς χειμῶνα ναυαγῶν καὶ τῶν συμπλεόντων ἑκάστου περιπλεκομένου σκεῦος πρὸς τὸ σωθῆναι, ἐκεῖνος μίαν τῶν ἀγκυρῶν περιεπλέξατο. A pedant, as his ship was sinking in a storm and his fellow passengers were each one embracing a piece of tackle … Continue reading
Σχολαστικὸς ἐν τῶι πλέειν χειμῶνος ὄντος σφοδροῦ καὶ τῶν οἰκετῶν κλαιόντων· Μὴ κλαίετε, ἔφη· πάντας γὰρ ὑμᾶς ἐν διαθήκαις ἐλευθέρους ἀφῆκα. A pedant on a sea-voyage, when there was a severe storm and his slaves were weeping, said: “Don’t cry: … Continue reading
Σχολαστικὸς κολυμβῶν παρὰ μικρὸν ἐπνίγη· ὤμοσε δὲ εἰς ὕδωρ μὴ εἰσελθεῖν, ἐὰν μὴ μάθῃ πρῶτον καλῶς κολυμβᾶν. A pedant nearly drowned while swimming; he swore that he would not go into the water again, if he did not learn first … Continue reading
Σχολαστικὸς εὐτράπελος ἀπορῶν δαπανημάτων τὰ βιβλία αὐτοῦ ἐπίπρασκε, καὶ γράφων πρὸς τὸν πατέρα ἔλεγε· Σύγχαιρε ἡμῖν, πάτερ· ἤδη γὰρ ἡμᾶς τὰ βιβλία τρέφει. A witty pedant, in difficulties for money, began to sell his books, and writing to his father … Continue reading
At Laudator Temporis Acti, Michael Gilleland quotes a witticism of Casaubon. It looks to me like a far more succinct variation on a story Cicero tells in his De Legibus – or rather has his character Atticus tell, since it’s … Continue reading
Palladas once more (A.P. 9.489): Γραμματικοῦ θυγάτηρ ἔτεκεν φιλότητι μιγεῖσα παιδίον ἀρσενικόν, θηλυκόν, οὐδέτερον. A grammarian’s daughter, having known a man, gave birth to a child which was masculine, feminine, and neuter. (translated by W. R. Paton)
I just uploaded three jokes to the Ioci Antiqui page, which still leaves me five days behind. Next week is ‘Winter Break’, so I should be able to catch up soon. Now I have some Interim reports to compile before … Continue reading
I just uploaded the 100th joke to the Ioci Antiqui page — actually two versions of the same joke, by Lucilius (or Lucillius) in Greek and Martial in Latin. Like today’s Greek joke, tomorrow’s joke, from a prose author not … Continue reading
Earlier today I uploaded six jokes to the Ioci Antiqui page, covering February 1st through 6th. These are in a new PDF file for February, here.
The last of the January jokes is now up, and I suppose I will go ahead and start a February PDF file tomorrow night. I won’t have time to test HTML Greek display before the weekend.
I’m putting the finishing touches on the six jokes necessary to bring Ioci Antiqui up to date. They should be up in an hour or so. I’m still mulling over how and when to make the transition to posting jokes … Continue reading
I spoke wrote posted too soon. The Ioci Antiqui page is again behind, though by only one day, since I have deleted the epigram of Martial that I’d already used for November 23rd. I’ll try to catch up tomorrow.
As promised, January’s Ioci Antiqui are now caught up through tomorrow (Monday), with five new jokes for the 19th through the 23rd, of which one or two are actually funny — opinions may differ as to which one or two. … Continue reading
Sorry about the missed days: I’ve been under the weather and bogged down in end-of-semester grading. I will post five more ancient jokes by midnight tonight to make up the deficit. These will be in the usual PDF file. At … Continue reading
Philárguros diathékas gráphwn heautòn kleronómon étaxen. A greedy man writing his will made himself his own heir. This is Philogelos 104. Not very funny? It’s actually better than average for the collection. Underlined e and o represent eta and omega … Continue reading
I hadn’t planned to start posting these as ordinary posts, but Filezilla is refusing to upload my PDF file. Is 118k too big? I’ll try again in the morning — or perhaps the afternoon, since it’s the first day of … Continue reading
Now that I have my laptop back and have found a temporary and partial fix for my spam-comment problem (more on that soon), it’s time to start posting more regularly. But first I have a question for my readers. I’m … Continue reading
It’s not quite midnight as I write, but I have uploaded the Joke of the Day for January 2nd. Just click on Ioci Antiqui in the left margin, and then click on ‘January’ for the PDF file. At the moment, … Continue reading